America is the land of the free and home of the brave, but it is also the land of the fearful. We are afraid of being un-American if we need help, need each other, or need to be liked. Individualism has permeated into the fibers of our thinking to such a degree that people genuinely believe that it is a sign of weakness to need one another. What we forget is that America is an individualistic culture, while most other cultures around the world are collectivistic, meaning that in our country we get our identity from being separate individuals, as opposed to an identity that is made up from a collection of people. Individualism has caused us to not only be detached from each other, and lacking empathy and concern, but on a deeper psychological and emotional level, we have lost our connection to our inner self. We no longer feel like we are a part of each other, we now feel apart from each other, and coincidentally, when cancer cells form in our body they act separate and apart from other cells.
Individualism is an American ideal, and those who need help are not supporting the values we hold so dearly. But the truth is, we are all dependent on each other, most of us do not kill our own food, we do not work for ourselves and if we are entrepreneurs we need our clients. We did not build our own houses or mine our own natural resources, and I could go on and on about how dependent we are on each other. But why don't we see that? Why do we continue to insist that needing help is unhealthy? We need to believe that we are not needy because weakness is stigmatized in our culture to an almost pathological degree. But if you were to avert your eyes from these words for a few minutes and really think about how dependent you are on other people, you will see that it is an inescapable reality. It is something we all need to accept, because needing each other is what will ultimately heal and unite us.
Dr. Steven Walker
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